WELCOME TO Day #2 in NOVEMBER! RSD/CRPS AWARENESS MONTH! Check back for daily facts and/or directions for our #CRPSHOPE CAMPAIGN this month! Please dont forget to come to our Facebook LIVE Event with Dr Leonard Weinstock MD, on Sunday November 4, 2018 at 4:00 PM EST
(He will be discussing CRPS & DX that often accompany it. Such as: SIBO, RLS, MCAS & he’s a GI Dr.)
#rsd #crps #crpshope #sibo #rls #mcas) *****REMEMBER TO USE #CRPSHOPE on all postings this month, to be noticed! Thank you
**Please share your RSD/CRPS AWARENESS RIBBON TEMPORARY TATTO PHOTOS WITH #crpshope & #wearthemsharethem4CRPS & #wearthemsharethem4crps https://www.instagram.com/p/BprPKL0HpNH/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1gtukkuyvy7am
reminder that if you ship ereri you’re fucking disgusting! 🙂
that’s a child and a man in his 30s!
besides that, do you honestly expect them to be romantic based on their interactions?? no!! that’s a mentor/student relationship!!!
honestly super gross and you’re immediately on my suspect list if you ship this gross shit!
look out, shippers, or you’ll end up on tumblr user cadet-ral’s list of people suspected of Shipping Crimes
In the fandom justice system, shipping based offenses are considered especially heinous. On Tumblr, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Anti Shipping Unit. These are their stories.
FADE IN:
[Ice-T is standing across the table from some white cishet woman, interrogating her]
Ice-T: We went through your phone and what do you think we found? [holds up a screenshot of AO3]
Woman: A fanfic?
Ice-T: Not just any fanfic. A Shieth fanfic. What kind of nasty pedo ships a literal child with an adult?
Woman: Aren’t they both in their 20s? And not real?
Ice-T: A literal child.
Woman: I don’t think you know what literal means…
Ice-T: Oh. You think you’re funny, eh? Well, what do you think the FBI would have to say about this? [pulls out his phone]
Woman: Nothing? They’re cartoon characters.
Ice-T: We’ll see about that. [dials] Hello, FBI? This is the Anti Shipping Unit and—
FBI: Oh my gaaaaawwwdd. Stop calling us.
Ice-T: But I have a nasty Shieth shipper here! They are—
FBI: We investigate real crimes here, detective. You know, real crimes, with real victims? Actual living, human victims! Not cartoon characters! Nobody gives a shit about your anime space twinks! [hangs up]
Ice-T: Lucky you. The FBI doesn’t want your case.
Woman: Please get out of my house.
[camera pans out, they were standing in the woman’s kitchen the entire time]
I’ve debated for a while about sharing this, but I think it’s important, and, to be fair, plenty of antis have shared the stories of their abuse.
So:
I support people creating romantic content similar to my abuse, even though that content contributed to my abuse.
Let me explain. I was very, very into Twilight when I was around 14. A couple years later a girl called me her lamb, and used the romanticization of jealousy and danger from that novel to excuse things like cutting me, stealing my phone, and demanding my passwords. Among other things. This continued until the end of high school, and it ripped apart every significant relationship in my life without anyone really realizing what was happening.
It’s definitely true that I didn’t recognize jealousy as abuse instead of romance. It’s true that I didn’t recognize “I love you” and “you can’t love anyone but me” as contradictions, and a part of that mentality came from the media I consumed. And she sure as fuck sent me fic – even forced me to write fic – which echoed those values. On a very base level, it is easy to blame my abuse on that fiction, on the unhealthy ideas of romance it gave me. For several years after getting out, I did blame romance like Twilight. I got angry when people I loved enjoyed it, and I thought I was protecting them by demanding that they stop.
But I was wrong.
Let me go out another level.
First of all, I grew up in a deeply homophobic town. There were exactly no adults in my life that I could have even told that I was in a relationship with a girl, let alone that I thought something was wrong. Abuse thrives in silence.
Second of all, I’d been homeschooled most of my life, which meant I had zero education on healthy relationships. I had no context outside of romance novels and fan fiction, which no adults knew I was reading. My view of romance was shaped by media because there were no other sources even trying to compete.
Third of all – and maybe this is most important – writing that fanfic, while in that situation, gave me a voice to things that I couldn’t even admit I was feeling. I wrote fic where a human loved a vampire, but they were scared, they were so scared, it felt like having a gun to their head all the time. They were so scared even as they loved the vampire, and they wanted them, and they wanted to help, and they wanted to be better. (She didn’t like that fic.) It took years before I would call what I experienced abuse, or seek out resources for victims. But fiction gave me a voice right then, when I needed one most.
Media didn’t get me abused. A society which failed utterly at telling me what a healthy relationship looked like got me abused. Parents and teachers and authority figures who were wildly homophobic got me abused. Fiction contributed, but if it wasn’t Twilight, it would have been something else – hell, apparently she repeated the same pattern after me with 50 Shades, and then with Captain America (somehow). Because above all, my abuser got me abused. She used fiction as a tool, but it could have been anything. If I hadn’t read Twilight, it would have been Johnlock, or Drarry, or Russia/America. All those things had more than enough content which portrayed danger and jealousy as sexy.
Do I still read Twilight? Fuck no, it’s a huge trigger. But I’ve stopped blaming it for what happened, because it was never Twilight’s job to teach me about romance. Nor was it fandom’s job to tell me, “if someone actually terrifies you, that’s dangerous, even if it’s sexy. If you love someone but they’re hurting you, you need help, not to try to fix them.” What hurt me most wasn’t fiction; it was the silence from every other quarter.
Media isn’t education on healthy relationships. It can’t be, and it never will be. “Fan fiction made me think that this was ok” means that there were no voices in our lives that we trusted more than fanfiction telling us that it wasn’t okay.
There will always be media that abusers can twist to make it look like what they’re doing is romantic and okay. Always. The abuse is still their fault, and the inability to counter harmful messages is the silence of society’s fault.
I’ll leave you with this: after I got out, I continued reading fic that featured jealousy and possessiveness as something hot. Because I did think it was hot; I now just knew firsthand that it was a kink to only be indulged in controlled situations. Firsthand experience is the harshest teacher, but it does work.
I just tag my own fic that features jealousy and possessiveness as “#abusive behavior.” Because if there is another girl like me out there, being sent these fics by her abuser, stuck in a situation she doesn’t understand – well, if it wasn’t my fic, it’d be someone else’s. The kink’s going to keep on existing. But maybe she’ll see the tag and figure something out.
Fiction is a tool, and taking one tool away won’t stop an abuser, because fiction isn’t causing abuse. If it wasn’t fiction, it’d be something else.
Stop blaming fiction for the actions of a cruel person, and the silence of the people who should have been protecting you.
It hurts to lay the blame at the feet of those you love, but if we deny the problems we will never fix them.
Tag yourself, I’m the tramp in slutty shorts buying a Mickey pretzel.
I mean my childless ass is going to WDW in April. I’ll make sure I get a mickey pretzel and wear slutty shorts.
… so people without kids should be banned, leaving only people *with* kids, but people with kids should be able to skip ahead to the front of the line… consisting of other people with kids?
Sounds like someone who really regrets not being the one in slutty shorts without a kid anymore.
I’m happy to announce that Secret Solenoid is opening for the fourth year in a row!
WHAT IS IT?
Secret Solenoid is a Secret
Santa exchange for Transformers fan artists and writers. If you’ve ever
been in a fandom gift exchange, you probably know what’s up. You sign
up, you get a prompt/request list from someone else, you make their gift
in secret, then at the end of the exchange you share it, and get a gift of your own! Secret Solenoid is hosted here on tumblr, and on the Secret Solenoid community over on pillowfort.
For all updates on the exchange, please join the Secret Solenoid group on pillowfort or follow the secretsolenoid tumblr.
This year (Nov 2018-Jan 2019) the schedule is:
November 1st: Signups Open
November 15th: Signups Close
November 18th: Wishlists Distributed
December 23rd: Gifts Complete/Check-in/Final Emergency Fills go out
January 1st-6th: Gifts Posted
JOINING THE EXCHANGE:
To sign up, you just need to fill out this google form! All the relevant questions are detailed in the form, but here’s a quick summary of what to expect.
The
first thing you’ll need to include is your name and a contact (email/tumblr/pillowfort). Whatever you list is how you’ll get information like your
wishlist for the exchange, and how the mod will be checking in with you, so make sure it’s something you check regularly.
Next, you’re going to include
information about the kind of gift you’d like to. Whether it’s fanfic,
fanart, or both, what continuities you’re familiar with, and what kind
of content you’d prefer to make. This is also where you let me know if
you can do a second gift, if you’d like to step in for someone who drops
out of the exchange.
And finally, your wishlist! The most important thing to include is your requests. Make sure to include at least three of them,
so that you’re giving your gift-maker plenty to work with!
For example, a wishlist might look like:
TFP, Bumblebee, Smokescreen: Bee and Smokey having a race!
IDW MTMTE/RiD, Swerve/Blurr, Bar battle
Any Continuity, Soundwave being badass in a dynamic action pose
NSFW prompts are allowed, as are prompts featuring TFOCs, but please make sure not all of your options feature them.
GIFTS:
Your gift should be a finished piece. If
you’re writing, your piece should be at minimum 1,000 words, and edited
before it’s sent in. For artists, that means an inked/colored piece,
rather than a sketch. If you’re doing traditional artwork, the
scan/photograph should be good quality.
All the deadlines are
listed above! If you find out that you’ll need an extension to finish
your gift, or if you’re going to have to drop out of the exchange,
please let me know before December 23rd!
SIGNUPS ARE OPEN! If you have any other questions, just @ this blog or send in an ask!
Verilidaine's Scrapbook 